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FUNNY ANECDOTES FROM LANGUAGE LEARNERS...

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Many thanks to all who have contributed these true stories of cultural and linguistic misunderstanding, faux pas and double-entendres.  Their names are in brackets right below each excerpt.

 

If you would like to share your experience please Contact us.  Your amusing anecdote may also feature in a new book to be published shortly.

“A friend of my former German teacher's car was stolen, and when asked where he'd parked it, he said "It was on a street called Einbahnstrasse!"
(A.J. Booth)
 
“Years ago at Christmas I said to a friend or to somebody, ‘sorry, I need to go home as I need to rape my presents’-oops!”
(C. Buzo) 
 
"I recall explaining to Latinos that I wanted to make love to a bus (coger) when I really just wanted to take it (tomar)!"
(S. Fernando)
 
“…when in China, the Chinese often like to give you a Chinese name which is easier to pronounce. At the language school where I studied, the teachers came up with a short-list of 3 potential names for me which the school then voted on.” 
(C. Davies)

 

“In the early stages of learning Spanish I did not know the tenses and having conversations about past events was impossible….this led to various misunderstandings as to whether I had done or was about to do something…..” 

(D. Freij)

 

“When I lived in Manchester it took me months to understand that whenever my friend was ‘having his tea’ before coming over to me, it didn’t mean some archaic English leaf-drinking ritual, but that it was actually his evening meal.”

(E. Moe)

 

“There’s the menu in a local restaurant translated to English from Spanish which translates ‘Pizza Margherita’ as ‘Daisy Pizza’, ‘revuelto de setas’ as ‘untidy mushrooms’ and ‘salmon a la plancha’ as ‘Salmon. Ironed’.”

(M. Dubois)

“A friend of mine asked her sister in law who was Italian, to get evaporated milk in supermarket. She came back and said ‘I couldn’t find disappeared milk’.”

(M. Baisova)

 

“My German friend looked horrified when I told him to ‘break a leg’ before an important exam!” 

(R. Chande)

 

“I used to tell everybody how badly constipated I was. ‘I have been constipated the whole week’ I used to say when I was in the UK. I did not know that the meaning of this word was quite different from ‘constipado’ in Spanish which means ‘to have a cold!!!!’”

 (M. Miņana)

 

“My grandmother once said to my dad in the car, ‘This place ‘Ausfahrt’ must be HUGE- we've been driving past it for ages!" (Ausfahrt is in fact the German word for “motorway exit”).

 (A.J. Booth)

 

“Friends of mine freshly arrived from France had a car breakdown. They spoke very little English and at the gas station / garage asked for a ‘candle’ – whereupon the employee looked at them in a funny way and said that he sold no candles but that the drugstore next door might have some (actually, my friends merely needed a spark plug – a ‘bougie’ in French – which is, literally translated, a ‘candle’)”

(M. Halt)

 

“Food shopping can be fun when you are looking for eggs and don't know the word - I leave the rest to your imagination!!!!”

 (R. Sale)

 

“My English friend meets her Mexican boyfriend’s parents for the first time and the first words that she utters are ‘estoy embarazada’ which she thought translated to ‘I’m embarrassed’ (for not speaking more Spanish)” when really it means ‘I’m pregnant’”.

(M. Dubois)

 

If you enjoyed these you can find many more in our forthcoming book about learning languages.  Check back frequently at www.getfluentfast.com for further information.